Why I take sides as a couples’ therapist.

Taking sides in couples’ therapy has historically been seen as a big “no-no”. I’ve learned differently. Siding with nothing ensures no real or lasting change, just a feel-good moment with a very short half-life. A few years ago I met a married heterosexual couple in their 40’s. Upper middle class and with a few minor children in tow, they were both charming and well-liked in their community.  They came in because the husband had told his wife he wouldn’t partake in any more social gatherings with her. She was beside herself because socializing was a big part of their lives. […]